Just because a celebrity is lame, moronic and/or perpetually under the influence of drugs and alcohol, doesn’t mean he or she can’t teach us something. As you may know, we at TheDailyContributor.com have posted a fully-interactive list of our picks for lamest celebrities: The Lame Fame 100. What you may not know is that despite our ridicule of these individuals, we also believe they may be making important sociological contributions for future studies of the human race.
Today, we look to our #3 lamest celeb, comedian Andy Dick, to see what can be learned from his tendency to sexually assault people, expose himself, and his skill at posing for photographs. Here are some things that I have learned from Andy Dick. And remember to vote Dick up or down on our list after you consider these life lessons!
1.Not all late night television is tolerant of preposterous sexual advances.
While channel surfing late night TV, you can see some pretty crazy things. If you’re lucky, one of those things is seeing Andy Dick licking someone’s face at William Shatner’s roast, paparazzi footage of him sexually assaulting innocent bystanders, or even better, getting escorted off of Jimmy Kimmel after attempting to feel up the Trump’s daughter, proof that late night television still has some old fashioned values:
2.The potential to get arrested for indecent exposure correlates directly with how attractive you are.
Speaking of late night television, one staple of TV after 10pm is commercials for Girls Gone Wild, the brainchild of another winner on our list, Joe Francis. In these censored commercials, you can clearly see many an intoxicated young woman exposing herself, often in public places. But rather than get arrested, they are filmed and then those films are sold at a considerable profit. Meanwhile, Dick was arrested outside of McDonald’s in 2004 for exposing himself. The lesson? Exposing yourself in public is only ok if people want to see you do so, i.e. if you are infinitely more attractive than Andy Dick.
3.If you look as crazy as possible in photographs, people might confuse your insanity with comedy.
I think that people give Andy Dick far too much credit. People see a wacky picture of him and laugh heartily, saying, “There’s that nutty comedian, Andy Dick.” What they don’t realize is that Andy Dick is certifiably insane. Take a close look at the following pictures. Is this the face of someone trying to make you laugh or someone who is coo coo for cocoa puffs?
 |
If he keeps this up Andy will need a payday loan.
July 15th, 2010 at 8:31 pm
I can’t really take Andy Dick. Let’s say that his a comedy actor not all of his actions should be taken as a joke! There is a right time to make yourself behave in some circumstances.